The Roundtable: NBA Season Predictions

The season is upon us Swish fam, and in preperation for what’s about to come we invite yall to The Roundtable. A collection of fake important, extremley disrespectful, well informed basketball minds whom we’ve hand chosen to shed light on what’s really good for this lockout shortend season. A Current Division 1 starter, a former Sebastian Telfair teammate, & a handful of college intramural champions. No need to type ESPN in that navigation bar b, all the facts are below.

Sometimes a hunnit and forty ain’t enough. And when it comes to discussing basketball that’s precisely the issue. Nobody wanna read 10 tweets in a row about who’s gonna win the chip or whether you think this is the year for Lebron n allat. So just sit back, relax and read some good insight to the 2011/2012 NBA Season. It’s Christmas Eve your moms or ya girl or ya aunt should be wrapping gifts not you fam.

The Roundtable:

@Trill_Coo_Joe “I just wanna eat my fried chicken in the law school library in peace”
1. Who wins MVP? Lebron James (a.k.a Danny Glover for the rest of this post). Danny says he’s back to having fun playing basketball, this spells disaster for the rest of the league. Expect a lot of blowouts, 30 second handshakes and sideline cooning.

Cooning

2. NBA Champion? Miami Heat. This could be the start of a dynasty, or an evil empire depending on if you’re a fan or not. The Heat come back this year with more talent and depth look for them to start out fast and never look back.

3. Rookie of the Year? Kyrie Irving. The Cavs roster lacks talent; they need Kyrie’s scoring and playmaking now. There are several players on this roster that wouldn’t start for Kentucky…and some who wouldn’t start for St. Benedicts (I’m looking at you Alonzo Gee)

4. Overachiever/underachiever? Overachieve: Memphis Grizzlies. The grizzlies have put together a talented roster from top to bottom. The loss of Darrell Arthur hurts them, but look for them to contend in the West.
Underachieve: The New York Knicks. Amar’e Stoudamire, Carmelo Anthony and Baron Davis are all on
one team. Do you know how many personality glasses these dudes are about to go through? If you
know a NY based company that sells those joints, buy stock know. Happy Hanukkah to Mr. Stoudamire.

5. Coach of the Year? Mark Jackson. (I only chose Mark so I could slander Monta). If you averaged 24 6 and 4, lived in California and earn 11 million a year would you:
A. Stay faithful to your wife and children.
B. Cheat with one (or several at a time) of the thousands of willing groupies, who will give you no problems.
Or
C. Send pictures of your Johnson to an employee of the organization, who has the ability to sue
you for millions of dollars. smh

6. Most Improved Player? Vanessa Bryant. After two seeds, 10 years of marriage, and the addition of California divorce laws look for Mrs. Bryant to have a great season. She already secured Home Court from Kob, look for her to average double digit luxury cars.

7. Whose washed: LA or Boston? LA. This could be a disastrous season for LA. No Cp3, Odom’s gone, Kobe lost his Newport beach mansion to his ex-wife, smh. It’s about to get really real in Hollywood. Now Kob tore a ligament in his wrist, trainers say it was a fall after a dunk attempt against the Clippers, I say them nights in the hotel been getting real lonely for Kob.

8. Does this season make or break Lebron’s legacy? Yes. However the Heat look poised to win it all. With his best supporting cast since Lethal Weapon 3 Bron/Danny should secure his place as one of the greats.

@IcebergAk “Hov > Jesus”
1. Who wins NBA MVP and why?
One word Lebron. Coming off the decision, making it to finals, and then the “eight point game” and losing in 6 no one has a bigger chip rather a boulder on their shoulder. I’m predicting he puts up 28ppg 9apg and 8rpg easily.He has all the motivation he needs….The King Back

2. Who wins Defensive POY and why?
Serge Ibaka…I think he finally learns how to block shots while staying out of foul trouble…also will have more national attention with the Thunder success so more people will witness his defensive ability…I also think people are tired of giving it to Dwight and will look to give it to anyone else. Serge is that guy.

3. 2011-2012 NBA Champion?
Sucks to say this but the Miami Heat…I can’t see Lebron going 0 for 3 in finals..I can’t see Dwade letting Lebron make them lose again. I can’t see Lebron failing again on the big stage, his legacy depends on it. The Celts are old and Lakers traded Odom for a pack of skittles and a Fiji water and still start a dude named Metta World Peace…The Bulls and OKC just aren’t there yet…Orlando going to be held hostage in this Dwight free agent situation…

4. Who wins Rookie of the Year?
My sleeper pick Markieff Morris. He’s in a good place in Phoenix with the great Canadian Wizard Steve Nash, he ran the floor and finished well in college. I see him playing getting a good 14 and 8 if he gets the playing time. Reminds me of a better Carl Landry not sure if that’s an insult or not yet.

5. Team that will overachieve/underachieve?
The NY Knickerbockers. It’s a short 66 game season and they are more familiar with eachother now I can see them going 42-24 which is way over the .500 and below they have been at for the past decade. Welcome to NYC. The Chicago Bulls. The Bulls had the best record in the NBA last year, I can’t see that happening again. we found out Boozer isn’t as good without Dwill, Luol is ok at best, and DRose has to make all the plays which might not be as easy this year.

6. Whose washed: LA or Boston?
Push. Kobe is 33 and had to get new knees in Europe. Ray Allen is 37 and can’t guard anyone. Derek Fisher is the worst starting PG in the NBA by far and was the face of the lockout for the players. KG can’t jump over a standing bottle, Artest changed his name to Metta World Peace…well that’s actually normal. They both are very old teams on their last legs literally.

7. Does this season make or break LeBrons legacy?
YES…he promised not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4….Wade has a chip where he had a top 5 performance in NBA finals history Lebron has TWO finals losses. Lebron scored 8 points TOTAL in a finals game. He also let the Jason ‘s Kidd and Terry contain him in the 4th quarter of those games. It’s all or nothing for Lebron right now this is his 8th year…he was the chosen one. It’s win or become Karl Malone. *flashes back to Jordan stripping Malone of the ball and maybe or maybe not pushing off Byron Russell and hitting “The Last Shot”*

It’s ironic that David Stern the ruler with an iron fist actually became a pushover and let the owners dictated his decisions. He let owners like crybaby bitch Dan Gilbert make him veto the CP3 to Lakers trade, then made (yes he had to have a hand in it) the Lakers trade the reigning sixth man of the year for a pair of concords, then he held the Clippers hostage and finally allowed them to get CP3. All because the owners bitched about big market team steal small market team players. David I hate rap music and hip hop so I imposed a dress code and fine everyone for anything as well as covered up the donaghy scandal Stern caved in. His reign as commish has to come to an end now.

@bk_da_skeet_man “Boakim Noah ignorant music and fly clothes”
1. Who wins MVP? Derrick Rose will win MVP based on team winning percentage and which of the candidates are most valuable to their team (he doesn’t play on a super team). And a lot of former MVPs recently have won this award in rows of 2: Tim Duncan, Steve nash, lebron James. Sleeper: watch out for kobe. new knee, trash supporting squad, smanging sanaa lathan = mvp season

2. Defensive Player of the Year? Dwight Howard… and offensively his post moves not even better than another former defensive player of the year: Ben Wallace.

3. NBA Champion? Phil Jackson dont respect you if you win the chip during a lockout season so it dont matter

4. Rookie of the Year? I have to go with my swish fam and say Kemba Walker. He should get plenty of burn this year and he’s proven that he has a quality that you can only be born with: killer instinct. (anti-bron)

5. Coach of the Year? Not Mike Brown

6. Whose washed: LA or Boston? LA and Boston both washed. Lakers still really might be ok but as a lakers fan you just have higher standards

7. Does this season make or break Lebron’s legacy? Fuck brons legacy. I just hope he been reading the book of tebow during the lockout and he might be ight.

Steven A Smith talk mad shit with a rainbow hairline and mini fro

@only1shoop “Blogger for sneakerwatch.com”
1. Who wins the 2011-2012 MVP and why?
I see Big Dwight winning the MVP this year. I look at things and say to myself “no other big man in the league really holds the fate of their season in his hands like Dwight.” Physically and offensively, he can’t be challenged, and last season he even added a little 10-15 foot jumper to his repertoire making him more dangerous.

2. Who’s your D. POY?
I’ma go with newly acquired Knick Tyson Chandler who was really a defensive anchor for the Hornets during his stint there and when the Mavs rocked the Heat and took it last year. Obviously the Knicks have been yearning for some kind of defensive stopper. And when/if the Knicks begin to improve defensively, I think Tys will be the reason.

3. 2011-2012 NBA Champ?
Miami. I think the Heat will bounce back from the Finals lost. They’ll be more focused, Bron will show up in the 4th, Bosh will play like he still got dreads and a Raptors jersey on, and Wade will continue to be their best player.

4. Rook of the Year?
I’ll give it to Kyrie. He’ll be coming to a Cavs team I believe who are in the middle of rebuilding again so I think the coaching staff will let him cook.

5. Underachiever/overachiever?
Underachieving team I got the Spurs. My overachieving team which is that city where Drake’s pops lives. I think Memphis will have more surprises this upcoming season once again.

6. Who’s more washed: LA or Boston?
I say Boston just because they’re older but they still got KG who hype niggas up and Shuttlesworth who’s gonna always have a gun and even Paul Pierce who still got it. They added Brandon Bass but yeah, ok.

7. Which team benefits the most from a 66 game schedule (48 Conference Games)?
The Knicks are gonna benefit because like the question says, the majority of the 66 games are against conference teams and with the East being the tougher conference in my opinion, their front court is gonna be something to deal with.

In regards to the lockout and the time the league was actually at a standstill, I don’t know how Derek Fisher, Billy King, and David Stern didn’t go missing and not end up found in a trunk or swamp. It seemed like they hired attorneys to train them how to explain the same shit in 100 different ways because every press conference they said the same thing, using different terminology that had similar meaning. Granted, they had a lot of shit to work out and still do, and even though they just put something together to start games by Christmas, shit still came out fucked up as you can see.

@kelvinmcneil “Starting Forward for the University of Delaware”
1. Who takes 2011-2012 MVP, why?
My gut tells me to go with Lebron, but I just can’t see them ever giving him another MVP EVER
again due to the fact he plays with Wade and Boshspice. That being sad I’m going with last years
MVP Derrick Rose!

2. Who wins Defensive POY and why?
Dwight Howard put another Defensive POY on the trophy shelf after this 66 game season.

3. 2011-2012 NBA Champion?
“As of right now, I’m going back and forth between OKC and LA, (The LA Lakers that is), based on
the moves I think LA will pull off I got the Lakers winning it all”- was my answer before the Bryant Divorce file, CP3 going to Clips, and Lamar Kardashian goin to the Mavs…I’m going with Miami!

4. Who wins Rookie of the Year?
Jimmer, and Kemba is who you want to win Rookie of the Year, but due to the fact that Reke aint
passin that shit and Kemba might be coming off the bench, I got it going to Kyrie Irving because the ball is gonna be in his hand 80% of the game, in his first pre season game he came off the bench and had 21pts (there’s reason he went #1 overall), and Byron Scott knows how to develop PG’s…just look at how he helped develop Chris Paul

5. Team that will overachieve/underachieve
Overachieve, the Memphis Grizzles; Underachieve, the Dallas Mavericks

6. Most improved player of the year?
The award goes to Stephen Curry, I got him putting up some good numbers this year for Gstate
Warriors.

7. Which team benefits the most from the 66 game schedule?
Every team is going to have a back to back to back night this season, some more then others but every team will have at least one…some teams are gonna really fold during these tough road games and traveling conditions…really look for the Clippers, Sixers and OKC with some young legs to take advantage during these periods.

Kenneth Benjamin “Swish Parker” “I locked Tu Holloway up for one quarter, the rest is history”
1. Who wins the 2011-2012 MVP and why? Kevin Durant. Can easily repeat his 28 & 6 numbers again. Brings back same team that should have better chemistry and be a top team in the West.

2. Who wins Defensive POY and why? Dwight Howard. Explanation not really needed.

3. 2011-2012 NBA Champion? Los Angeles Lakers

4. Who wins Rookie of the Year? Duke Blue Devils alum Kyrie Irving

5. Team that will overachieve/underachieve? Overachieve – Houston Underachieve- San Antonio

6. Does this season make or break LeBrons legacy? LeBrons legacy already tarnished. Won’t get as many rings as my son Adam Morrison

7. Most improved player of the year? JaVale McGee

8. Whose washed: LA or Boston Boston? A bummed up Pierce, old ass KG, no Jeff, a wild out Rondo, no hammers from Delonte. All they got is Ray Ray.

By 2018, LeBron James will be huskier than Anthony Mason

Shouts to Bob, Ak, Boakim, Shoop, Kelv and Blackz. I’m pretty sure that first 6 could win a cpl D1 games right now.

Swishhhhhh

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