What We’ve Learned Since April 28th

Since that glorious Saturday morning we have been blessed with constant basketball games, clips, and heated debates. I’ll be the first to admit that these playoffs have been quite the bummer, but we gotta take the good with the bad and everything in between.

1. First thing that has been evident throughout these playoffs (as well as reg season) is that the injury bug is getting around more than the Nose Ring rapper. Dwight didn’t even make it to the dance, DRose and Iman Shumpert went down in Game 1’s, Caron Butler almost got taken off here in Game 1, Chris Bosh ab workout clearly wasn’t doing enough as he’s gone down indefinitely with some sort of abdominal strain. Now Kendrick Perkins is playing with some sort of recurring injury, I think at this point we’re all just waiting to see who gets hit next, somebody will.
2. Get ADIDAS the fuck out of here. At this point you’d be better off buying those John Wall Zig Zag’s or even the Under Armour joints would suffice. I touched on why Adidas was trash a year ago on here I don’t remember the post, but now y’all see. Think about it, Chauncey went out a long while ago, Agent Zero came back and took the Grizzlies from contender to first round losers, those husky ass sneaks that Dwight wears wasn’t able to hold him up, DRose and Iman went down with ACL injuries in the same day, all of this provided by Adidas. Time to retire those Crazy 8s fam, tuck those shell toes under your bed, keep those Stan Smith’s off my grass bruh. Oh and that damn near 200 milli that Adidas gave to DRose earlier this year lookin like that 100 milli the Knicks threw Allan Houston in the triple oh.
3. Braids Kill Brain Cells. 
I thought for like a good day that he was gonna flashback to a young #32 in Phoenix Amar’e but I should have known better. After a Game 2 loss we learned why braids don’t correlate to success (see Allen Iverson). We learned that Braids Kill Brain Cells but we also learned that fire extinguishers and the glass surrounding them cause injuries, well I actually think we already knew that, Amare did too, those braids just clouded his better judgement.
4.  As great as the Thunder were in Game 1 versus the Lakers, the country for this shirt never existed. The glasses as well. Russ really a barometer of what’s to come in the next generation. It’s possible that one day my little brother will pull off a lay similar to this and not think twice about it. We’ve learned that times are changing and non prescription glasses are what durags and wild husky earrings were in the early millennium.
5. My son Brick still not tryna clap nothing in the closing moments of games. It’s stressful being a fan of Bron and the Knicks, it’s really lose-lose. Let’s go Danny Green.
6. Lakers washed. We posed the question who was more washed: Lakers, Boston, and San Antonio (I believe). Boston is what we’ve expected them to be, San Antonio has exceeded expectations. The Lakers almost lost to RG3 and Biggavels. Now they bout to get swept by the Thunder. I blame most of this on Mike Brown, a little on Kobe and a little on Andrew Bynum’s gray hairs.

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